What are the different types of love mentioned in the Bible?

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TL;DR:

The Bible uses three Hebrew words and three Greek words when talking about love. The Bible calls us to love God and to love others.

from the old testament

  • In Hebrew, the word ahab is a general word for love that means "to have or show affection." This affection can be platonic between friends or family members ("Take your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love" in Genesis 22:2), for objects ("prepare for me delicious food, such as I love" in Genesis 27:4), or it may be passionate sexual love between a married couple ("So Jacob served seven years for Rachel, and they seemed to him but a few days because of the love he had for her" in Genesis 29:20). So ahab is similar to the English word "love" in that it includes a wide range of emotion.
  • The Hebrew word dod is more specifically the erotic love between a man and a woman. Song of Solomon 1:2 uses this word: "Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth! For your love is better than wine." The Lord uses this word when He compares Himself to a husband with Israel as His bride: "When I passed by you again and saw you, behold, you were at the age for love, and I spread the corner of my garment over you and covered your nakedness" (Ezekiel 16:8). So sexual love was sometimes conveyed using this distinct Hebrew word in the Bible.
  • Perhaps one of the most difficult Hebrew words to translate into English is chesed. Chesed in Hebrew is a type of constant, steadfast love that contains an element of loyalty, mercy, pity, and favor. Ezra used this word to express this type of loyalty, mercy, and favor when he said, "For we are slaves. Yet our God has not forsaken us in our slavery, but has extended to us his steadfast love before the kings of Persia, to grant us some reviving to set up the house of our God, to repair its ruins, and to give us protection in Judea and Jerusalem" (Ezra 9:9). In many translations chesed is rendered "lovingkindness," "unfailing love," or "steadfast love." It is the love God has for His people and the love He expects in return. Nehemiah declared about God, "You are a God ready to forgive, gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love, and did not forsake them" (Nehemiah 9:17). God told His people, "For I desire steadfast love and not sacrifice, the knowledge of God rather than burnt offerings" (Hosea 6:6). It is the type of love when two people are in covenant with one another (like Jonathan and David in 1 Samuel 20:15), continually committed to the other's benefit and well-being no matter the circumstances. Chesed is an unconditional, everlasting love as expressed in the last line of every verse in Psalm 136. Psalm 136:1 begins: "Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever."

from the new testament

  • In the New Testament, the Greek word phileo is used to express the idea of affection in a platonic way for a friend or family member, or even enjoyment of an object or action. The word phileo was used to describe Jesus’ relationship to His friend Lazarus, when the sisters reported, "he whom you love is ill" (John 11:3). Phileo is used to describe the love between family members when Jesus said, "Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me" (Matthew 10:37). It is also used to describe the scribes' and Pharisees' preference for social honor when Jesus said, "they love the place of honor at feasts and the best seats in the synagogues" (Matthew 23:6).
  • The Greek word storge is specifically the love of family members, particularly the love between parents and children. It is used only in Romans 12:10 when Paul says, "Love one another with brotherly affection."
  • While phileo and storge are Greek words translated as "love" in the New Testament, the most often used Greek word for "love" is agape.
  • Agape can have a wide range of meaning, but generally refers to committed benevolence toward another. It is used for God's love for Jesus ("The Father loves the Son and has given all things into his hand" in John 3:35), God's love for His people ("For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life" in John 3:16), as well as people's love for one another ("You shall love your neighbor as yourself" in Matthew 22:39). Used in hundreds of verses in the New Testament, agape, is the most likely Greek word a reader of the Bible will see translated as "love" in English.
  • One other Greek word for love is eros, which is a passionate sexual love, but this Greek word is not used in the Bible. However, knowing that the Greek language had this word for sexual love, and that the authors clearly chose to use a different word, helps English-speakers better understand what the authors could and could not have possibly been referring to in different passages.

implications for today

Loving God and loving others are central commands in the Bible that shape our lives and relationships. Jesus taught in Matthew 22:37–39, "You shall love (agape) the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love (agape) your neighbor as yourself." These verses emphasize the priority of whole-hearted devotion to God and the inseparable connection between loving Him and loving those around us. First John 4:7–8 says, "Beloved, let us love (agape) one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love." Our ability to love others flows from experiencing God's love and reflects our relationship with Him. Jesus told the disciples that the way people will know we are Christians is by our love (agape) for one another (John 13:35). John 15:13 also tells us: “Greater love (agape) has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” Jesus did this for us as He willingly gave His life so that all who believe in His death and resurrection will be saved. We have a call and an example of love to follow as Christians. As we embrace God's love for us and extend it to others, we fulfill His purpose for our lives and demonstrate His transformative power in our relationships and in the world.

understand

  • There are several types of love mentioned in the Old Testament: ahab, reflecting a general love; dod referring to sexual love; and chesed, representing a steadfast, loyal, and covenantal love.
  • There are several types of love mentioned in the New Testament: phileo, referring to affectionate love; storge, describing familial love; and agape, a term for committed, benevolent love.
  • The most prevalent type of love mentioned in the call for Christians to love God and love others is agape.

reflect

  • What do the different types of love reveal about God’s character and how that is communicated in our relationships?
  • How have you experienced God’s steadfast, loyal love (chesed) in your own life?
  • How can you incorporate selfless, sacrificial love (agape) into your daily interactions, especially with difficult people or people in the church?

engage

  • The best way to understand what type of love the Bible is referencing is to read each verse in its entire context. Reading verses within the context of that particular story or passage, while keeping in mind the entire narrative of the whole Bible, helps readers discern a word's specific meaning. Online tools (like Blue Letter Bible) where readers can research the original language can also shed light and deepen a reader's understanding. Ultimately, the Holy Spirit reveals the truth of God's Word. Jesus said, "But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you" (John 14:26; cf. 1 Corinthians 2:10–16). So when a reader of the Bible asks for the Holy Spirit to teach him/her and then reads verses in context while checking trusted study tools, it will not be difficult to understand what type of love the Bible references. "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him" (James 1:5).
  • What are the differences and similarities between ahab, dod, chesed, phileo, storge, and agape? How do these deepen our understanding of love?
  • How can our church demonstrate agape love in the community? What practical steps can we take to show this love to those in need?