How should conflict within the church be handled?

TL;DR:

Conflict within the church should be handled with humility, love, and a desire for reconciliation and restoration. Jesus and the apostles instructed believers to seek peace through private reconciliation, patient correction, and forgiveness, so unity and the witness of Christ’s body are preserved.

what does the bible say?

Scripture acknowledges that inner-church conflict will inevitably arise but provides clear guidelines for resolving it in a manner that preserves unity and honors Christ. Jesus taught that when one believer sins against another, a resolution should begin privately. If the issue remains unresolved, one or two others should help mediate, and only after that should it be brought before the church (Matthew 18:15-17). This process prioritizes relationships, with an emphasis on restoring the believer(s) who have sinned.

Paul likewise urged believers to guard unity through humility and patience, working diligently to maintain peace within the body of Christ (Ephesians 4:2-3). When conflict involves grave sin, leaders are called to confront it with gentleness but also firmness, aiming for restoration (Galatians 6:1; 1 Corinthians 5:1-5). Lesser disagreements—such as personal preferences or secondary matters—should be met with grace and self-restraint, recognizing that diversity of opinion on non-critical matters is natural within the body (Romans 14:1-4).

In every case, the goal of conflict resolution is reconciliation. The church demonstrates the gospel when its members forgive one another, submit to God’s Word, and seek peace that reflects the character of Christ (John 13:34-35; Colossians 3:12-15).

from the old testament

The Old Testament does not address “the church” directly, but it provides principles for handling conflict within God’s covenant community. Moses gave instructions for resolving disputes among the Israelites, using appointed leaders to hear cases and render fair judgments (Exodus 18:13-26; Deuteronomy 1:16-17).
The Law emphasized living peaceably and following God’s statutes to maintain unity within the community (Leviticus 19:17-18; Numbers 35:30-31). Upholding God’s commands and seeking reconciliation preserves relationships.

from the new testament

Conflict among believers is not new to the church, and the New Testament shows that disagreements and offenses can easily damage fellowship, hinder ministry, and distort the gospel’s witness. Paul warned against taking ordinary disputes before unbelieving courts, emphasizing that such actions dishonor Christ and divide His people (1 Corinthians 6:1-7). Indeed, even if the conflict involves material loss, Paul says it would be better to suffer that loss than to sue another believer publicly (1 Corinthians 6:7).
The heart of biblical conflict resolution is humility and love. Paul urged believers to walk “with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Ephesians 4:2-3). Though we are all sinners, Christ humbled Himself out of love and died for us. Biblical conflict resolution follows that pattern of humble love for the one causing the conflict.
Jesus gave a straightforward process for addressing conflicts from sin and for restoring fellowship. First, the offended believer is to go privately to the person in sin to seek repentance and reconciliation (Matthew 18:15). Privacy is important because it prevents gossip, affords the offender the dignity of responding, and even helps avoid escalating what was simply a misunderstanding. If the person refuses to listen, one or two witnesses are to be brought in to confirm what is said and to ensure fairness (Matthew 18:16). Their role is not to pressure the one accused of sin, but to provide accountability to the process. They are there to confirm what is being said as well as the response of the other. If repentance still does not occur, the matter is to be shared with the church so that the whole body may lovingly urge the person to turn back (Matthew 18:17a). But if even the church’s appeal is rejected, the unrepentant one is to be treated as an outsider (Matthew 18:17b), meaning fellowship is withheld until repentance is demonstrated. This stern final step is not for punishment but to protect the church’s holiness and to awaken the sinners’ hearts to restoration. If they are true believers, being cut off from other believers may motivate them to repent.
The New Testament also recognizes that not all disagreements involve sin. Some arise from differing convictions about nonessential matters such as diet, special days, or traditions. Paul instructed believers not to judge one another over such issues but to act in faith, showing grace toward those with different consciences (Romans 14:1-4). In these instances, conflict is avoided when mature believers recognize that the other believer’s difference of opinion does not undermine the Gospel, and therefore, they “agree to disagree” about it.
Ultimately, the goal of resolving conflict is peace and restoration within the church. When believers forgive as Christ has forgiven them, relationships are healed, and the body is strengthened. Scripture assures that one day all sinful conflict will cease, and every believer will be perfected in love and harmony with one another in Christ (Colossians 3:12-15; Philippians 2:1-4). Until that day, God calls His people to pursue reconciliation that displays His grace to the watching world.
One last note: Scripture’s call to handle matters within the church does not mean that serious crimes—such as abuse or other physical or sexual offenses—should be kept hidden or managed privately. Civil authorities exist to protect and administer justice in such cases, and believers honor God when they utilize this provision (Romans 13:4). Most issues, however, are everyday relational and spiritual conflicts that arise within the body. In those cases, the church is called to pursue reconciliation through humility and forgiveness rather than dragging others through the court system.

implications for today

How do you respond when conflict arises in the church? Conflicts within the church can be challenging, especially if you are witnessing it rather than directly involved. Scripture calls every believer to approach these moments with wisdom, humility, and love. If another believer has personally hurt you, your first step should be to ask God for wisdom (James 1:5) and approach him or her privately and prayerfully. Then, following Jesus’ pattern, go directly and graciously to the person who has sinned against you. Speak truth with gentleness. Don’t assume bad motives, and listen to your brother or sister in Christ. Your goal should be to resolve the conflict, including repentance and reconciliation when necessary. Conflict resolution is often a lengthy process. The steps Jesus gave are not intended to be done in rapid fire. You should only escalate when it becomes clear that reconciliation cannot happen at the current step. Patience, prayer, and ongoing communication are key to preserving unity.

If you are not directly part of the conflict, your role is just as important. Resist the temptation to take sides or spread details that are not yours to share. Listen compassionately and guard against gossip. Pray for all involved and for your church’s leaders as they seek to bring unity and healing. Often, the most loving action is quiet intercession and patient encouragement. Every believer contributes to the peace of the church by responding in ways that reflect Christ’s character—seeking restoration, speaking carefully, and trusting the Holy Spirit to bring repentance and lasting unity.

understand

Church conflict should be handled with humility, love, and a focus on reconciliation.
Jesus gave us a process for handling conflict: Approach privately, then with witnesses, and then bring before the church if needed.
We should show grace in nonessential disagreements and avoid gossip to preserve unity.

reflect

How do you respond when a fellow believer offends you, and how could you apply humility and love in that situation?
Are there areas where you struggle to forgive or pursue reconciliation, and what steps could you take to follow Christ’s example?
How do you handle disagreements over nonessential matters?

engage

How can we foster a culture where conflicts are resolved privately and lovingly before escalating?
How might gossip or taking sides harm unity, and how can we actively prevent that?
How can we encourage one another to pursue reconciliation and restoration, reflecting Christ’s character in every disagreement?