Broken relationships, disappointment in others, loss of a job, an unfulfilled dream, or other dire circumstances can cause heartbreak, and the pain can feel overwhelming.
How can I heal from a broken heart / heartbreak?
Society offers many remedies for heartbreak, ranging from shopping to getting a makeover to harmful activities such as excessive drinking of alcohol, doing drugs, or jumping into a quick relationship to salve the hurt. Many of these activities and actions will only temporarily distract us from the hurt; some will cause lasting harm to ourselves and others.
Perhaps the most consistent solution society gives to deal with heartache is time. Time will help, but believers in Jesus don't have to simply wait in order to find any relief for the pain of heartbreak. We can go to God with our broken hearts and find comfort.
How? Turn your attention to God's care for your heart. God says He is interested in your heart (1 Samuel 16:7). Look at this passage from Psalm 147:2–5: "The LORD builds up Jerusalem; he gathers the outcasts of Israel. He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. He determines the number of the stars; he gives to all of them their names. Great is our Lord, and abundant in power; his understanding is beyond measure."
Set there right between God's care for His people as a nation (Psalm 147:2) and His power to create the universe (Psalm 147:4), He focuses on the individual and the very core of care for the individual (Psalm 147:3). Then, the psalm reminds us of the greatness of God, His ability, and His immeasurable understanding (Psalm 147:5). God truly does care, and He truly is amazing. Remembering this, and turning to God, can be a balm to our heartache.
Job offers us a model of how to react to heartbreak. When he loses his children, wealth, and eventually even his health, his reaction is to grieve and also to worship God (Job 1:20–21; 2:9–10). Job knew God is always faithful, and Job determined to be faithful as well. We, too, can grieve, and do so while still trusting in God and worshipping Him.
Psalm 34 also offers us an example of how to deal with a broken heart. David called upon the name of the Lord (Psalm 34:4), then reminded himself of God's nearness and help (Psalm 34:18). He concludes by expressing confidence in God's love: "Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the LORD delivers him out of them all … The LORD redeems the life of his servants; none of those who take refuge in him will be condemned" (Psalm 34:19).
Heartbreak is a common human experience. It is quite a rare thing to put your trust in any person or circumstance and not be disappointed at some level. Every person has faults and is unable to live up to his or her own design because of sin. The fallen nature of our world means we live with disappointments and hurts. But we need not despair!
God has said that He "will never leave your nor forsake you" (Hebrews 13:5). God can comfort you (2 Corinthians 1:3–4). Second Corinthians 4:7–12 reminds us that our earthly lives are temporary and often demonstrate death, but there is life in Jesus. Instead of succumbing to the hopeless feeling that may accompany our broken hearts, we can use heartbreak to remind us that only God can truly fulfill and meet our deepest needs. Let your heartbreak drive you to God, where you will find unfathomable love.
Psalm 62:8 says, "Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us." Psalm 56:8 tells us that God keeps account of our tears. It is okay to be hurt and to share your heartbreak with God. Pour it out to Him; then trust Him to comfort you. Life is not over; God is at work and He is faithful to complete His good work in you (Philippians 1:6).
Be encouraged by Colossians 3:2–4: "Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory."
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