God designed sex to be a joyful and intimate gift to be experienced within marriage (Genesis 2:24–25; Proverbs 5:18–19). Having sex outside of marriage is a sin that often leads to painful consequences such as guilt, regret, and unplanned pregnancy (1 Corinthians 6:9; Galatians 5:19). Yet God offers forgiveness to all who confess and turn to Him, even when natural consequences remain (1 John 1:9). The Bible does not command a couple who becomes pregnant to marry, because marriage is meant to be a lifelong covenant built on love, faith, and commitment—not merely a reaction to circumstances. A baby is always a blessing and never a punishment, but wisdom is needed to discern how best to care for the child. Parents are responsible to provide emotional, spiritual, and financial support, which may involve marriage, co-parenting, or adoption depending on what is healthiest and God-honoring. Above all, each decision should be made prayerfully, seeking God’s guidance and relying on His grace to lead the family forward (James 1:5).
In our current society, sex outside of marriage is commonplace. Due to the sexualization of our culture, it appears to some that no one possesses the discipline or commitment to remain a virgin until they are married. However, many Christians, understanding and obeying God's Word and plan for our lives, wait until marriage before having sex.
If a couple does not follow God’s purposes and plans for sex, getting pregnant is a possibility. It is important to remember, though, that the baby is not at fault nor a punishment. A child is always a blessing. However, wisdom is needed to figure out if a couple who gets pregnant before marriage should get married.
The Bible doesn't address whether a woman who gets pregnant should marry the baby's father. It is not a biblical mandate that they get married. Sometimes, it is better that the couple does not get married. Perhaps they are too young or one or both people are married. Having a baby is not a reason to enter a lifetime committed union. Getting married does not make you right in God's eyes. God's forgiveness is what makes us right in His eyes. What is important is repenting, recognizing that having sex outside of marriage was sinful, and seeking God’s will for the next right step.
First both the mother and father are obligated to ensure their child or children are cared for emotionally, spiritually, and financially. Ensuring the children's needs are met may look like a variety of things, including parenting together in marriage, co-parenting without marriage, adoption, etc. Support is absolutely needed to raise a child, including one born out of wedlock, so wisdom is needed to know where that support should come from.
Anyone contemplating marriage after getting pregnant outside of marriage should be sure their future spouse is committed to God and His design for marriage—a lifelong, monogamous relationship that honors God. If you already planned to marry, then seek out solid, biblical pre-marital counseling. This, not your pregnancy, will help you determine what to do about marriage. Seek God's wisdom (James 1:5).
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