Is singleness better than marriage? Is marriage better than singleness?

from the old testament

• Marriage is a gift from God. God created Eve for Adam, and His reason was, "It is not good that the man should be alone" (Genesis 2:18).
• Proverbs says of marriage, "He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord" (Proverbs 18:22).
• But not everyone is suited for marriage. For instance, God forbid his prophet Jeremiah from marrying as God was intending judgement on Judah (Jeremiah 16:2).

from the new testament

• Those who are tempted by sexual desires should marry to prevent them from sinning. Paul writes, "To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion" (1 Corinthians 7:8-9).
• Jesus described some "who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven" (Matthew 19:12). Those who do not want to be completely devoted to the Lord should remain single (1 Corinthians 7:32-35); otherwise, their "interests are divided" (1 Corinthians 7:34). Paul used himself as an example of someone who was more suited to singleness because of his calling from God (1 Corinthians 7:7).
• Marriage is a lifelong commitment. Some are not ready for that commitment and would be better to remain single (Matthew 19:3-10).

implications for today

Do I or don't I? That question applies to whether to get a doughnut with your morning coffee to much weightier decisions like saying “I do.” Marriage isn't for everybody and everybody isn't for marriage. Isn't it interesting, though, that every person will experience singleness; not everyone will experience marriage.

So which is better than the other? The answer is neither. We can honor God whether we are married or single. In marriage, we have the opportunity to reflect Christ through sacrificially loving our spouse, being faithful, and living out our faith with our spouse (Ephesians 5:25–33). In singleness, we have the opportunity to devote ourselves to God and serve others without the responsibilities that come with marriage (1 Corinthians 7:32–35). Neither relationship status makes someone more complete, more mature, or more valuable. Our identity isn't “single,” “married,” “dating,” or “divorced”—it is found in Christ.

That can be difficult to remember in a culture that can make marriage seem like the finish line of adulthood—or singleness as the ultimate "do what you want" ideal. Marriage and singleness can both be good gifts; neither is a consolation prize. If you're single, don't put your life on hold waiting for a spouse; use this season to grow in your relationship with God, serve others, build meaningful friendships, and pursue the purposes He has given you. If you're married, don't expect your spouse to fulfill needs that only God can meet; instead, see your marriage as an opportunity to love sacrificially, grow in holiness, and point each other toward Christ. Above all, whether married or single, seek to honor God with the life He has given you (1 Corinthians 10:31).