What does the Bible say about coarse jesting or joking (Ephesians 5:4)?

WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY?

Ephesians 5:4 lists three types of improper speech: obscenity (filthy speech), silly/foolish talk, and coarse jesting. These are found within a larger list of sinful behavior, which focuses on sexual immorality and impurity (Ephesians 5:3, 5). It is therefore possible that Paul was specifically thinking of jokes of a sexual or deviant nature. Regardless, the point is that all of our speech, even in a relaxed environment, must be fitting for a follower of Christ. That which Jesus hates, such as sexual immorality, is something we must not joke about. The Bible teaches that what we say evidences what is in our hearts (Matthew 12:34–37). Therefore, the Christian is to put off all his or her previous sinful habits, including improper speech (Colossians 3:8), and to put on the new self, becoming more like Christ (Colossians 3:10). In Ephesians 5:4, putting on the new self is described as being thankful. When we are thankful to God, we begin to want to emulate Him. As we do, even our improper speech will begin to be replaced with God-glorifying words.

FROM THE OLD TESTAMENT

• Foolish speech is associated with wicked people. For example, Proverbs 10:31–32 reads, “The mouth of the righteous brings forth wisdom, but the perverse tongue will be cut off. The lips of the righteous know what is acceptable, but the mouth of the wicked, what is perverse.” The difference between the two types of speech lies in the heart of the speaker. The righteous man or woman will speak what is good, while the wicked will speak what is perverse.
• The Bible also warns against joking about sin. Proverbs 14:9 says, “Fools mock at the guilt offering, but the upright enjoy acceptance.” A guilt offering was a sacrifice offered when one sinned. The imagery here is of one mocking the idea of offerings, making light of sin.
• Rather than speaking in ways that dishonor God, we are to use our mouths to praise and bless Him: “I will bless the LORD at all times; his praise shall continually be in my mouth.” (Psalm 34:1).

FROM THE NEW TESTAMENT

• Ephesians 5:4 reads, “Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving.”
• “Filthiness” can also be translated as “obscenity” and refers to profane speech. “Foolish talk” refers to speaking like a fool or intentionally being stupid. “Crude joking” is the idea of telling edgy or risqué jokes that make light of sinful behavior.
• In the verses before and after, Paul referred to sexual and other impurities. They read, “sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints … For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous (that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God” (Ephesians 5:3, 5).
• Because Ephesians 5:4 falls between these two verses, it may be that Paul had in mind joking and other speech of a sexual or similarly impure nature. Regardless, it’s clear that those who practice this list of things, including the bad speech, are acting like unbelievers, perhaps even indicating they are not saved. An unbeliever is one who “has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.”
• When Jesus was on earth, He explained that what we say is evidence of our hearts. Speaking to the Pharisees who claimed to be righteous, He said, “How can you speak good, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. The good person out of his good treasure brings forth good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure brings forth evil” (Matthew 12:34–36).
• What is in our heart comes out in our speech. If we are constantly making perverse jokes, that may evidence either that we are not saved (don’t yet have a new heart) or that we aren’t working to put off our bad habits. Though a believer is saved and has the Holy Spirit helping them mature (Romans 8:13; Philippians 1:6), he or she is still to actively put off sinful behavior. Paul said, “Put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices” (Colossians 3:8–9).
• Instead of sinning, the believer is to “put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator” (Colossians 3:10). The “new self” is who the believer is to be. Putting on the new self refers to doing what honors God and Christ.
• Back in Ephesians 5:4, Paul ended with, “instead let there be thanksgiving.” Instead of the coarse jesting and obscenities, we are to be thankful to God for Christ. As we thank Him, we will start to become like Him. In that way, we can put off filthy talk and put on Christlikeness.

IMPLICATIONS FOR TODAY

God is not against humor or laughter. Jesus was known for having a sarcastic wit that could cut to the heart of an issue. However, as sinners, everything we do is tainted by sin, and that includes our jokes. God hates sin (Proverbs 6:16–19), and so we must never make light of it. Whenever we laugh at a “double entendre” or wink knowingly when someone talks about staying the night at his girlfriend’s house or tease someone for not getting drunk, we are saying that what God hates isn’t such a big deal.

But it is. It leads to death and destruction. Sin condemns a person to hell for eternity. This is because God is holy and created us to be like Him. Whenever we sin, even if it’s just joking about sin, we are thumbing our noses in our Creator’s face. God warns us about careless words spoken. In fact, sin is such a big deal that no one could escape that coming wrath if it weren’t for God mercifully sending His Son, Jesus, to take sin’s punishment through His death. As believers, we must carefully avoid joking about sin to remind the world just how terrible it is.

UNDERSTAND

• Coarse jesting, foolish talk, and obscenity are sinful because they make light of what God takes seriously.
• What comes out of our mouths reveals what is in our hearts.
• Believers are called to actively replace sinful speech with thanksgiving and words that reflect a heart being renewed in Christ.

REFLECT

• What does your everyday speech, including humor, reveal about the condition of your heart?
• In what ways are you actively working to replace speech habits that don't honor God with ones that do?
• How does cultivating thankfulness toward God practically change the way you talk with others?

ENGAGE

• How should Christians distinguish between humor that is wholesome and appropriate versus humor that crosses into coarse jesting, as Paul describes it?
• What does it mean practically for a community of believers to hold one another accountable for speech that dishonors God?
• How does the connection between speech and heart inform the way Christians approach spiritual growth and sanctification?