Christian communication—What are the keys?

WHAT DOES THE BIBLE SAY?

The gift of communication comes with the weight of responsibility. Two of the Ten Commandments are to not take the Lord’s name in vain (Exodus 20:7) or falsely testify against someone (Exodus 20:16). Instead of speaking in our flesh, we should praise God (Psalm 150) and speak the truth in love to others (Ephesians 4:15). We must model our life after Jesus, who prioritized communication with God (Mark 1:35) and had love and compassion for those who persecuted Him (Luke 23:34). Thankfully, because of Jesus, we are no longer bound to our old fleshly behaviors (Galatians 5:19-21), but through the power of the Holy Spirit, we can communicate in a Christ-like way (Galatians 5:22-23; 2 Corinthians 5:17). We should keep in mind Matthew 12:33-35, knowing that what we say can potentially reflect the state of our heart. Instead of speaking in pride, we can emulate Christ’s humility (Philippians 2:5-8) and remind ourselves that it is through the Holy Spirit we can do anything good (Philippians 4:13). Additionally, instead of speaking in a corrupt way, we should build up others (Ephesians 4:29). Practically speaking, we can pursue Christ-like communication daily by applying James 1:19 to our life.

FROM THE OLD TESTAMENT

• There are some Christian communication do’s and don’ts. One thing we must never do is take the Lord's name in vain (Exodus 20:7).
• We also must not lie or bear false witness (Exodus 20:16), but speak the truth instead.
• Instead of cursing God or taking His name in vain, we are to praise Him (Psalm 150).

FROM THE NEW TESTAMENT

• In Matthew 12:33-35 Jesus says, "Either make the tree good and its fruit good, or make the tree bad and its fruit bad, for the tree is known by its fruit. You brood of vipers! How can you speak good, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. The good person out of his good treasure brings forth good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure brings forth evil." Jesus taught that the words that come out of our mouths are ultimately a reflection of what is in our hearts.
• Jesus communicated with the Father early and often through prayer (Mark 1:35). Often the reason our communication with others is so poor is because we have spent little time communicating with God.
• Jesus had compassion for and prayed for the very people who persecuted and crucified Him (Luke 23:34a). We, too, should love our enemies and show grace to those who betray us.
• Before we had the Spirit, our communication was the product of our sin nature, which is referred to in Scripture as "the flesh" (Galatians 5:19-24). Communication produced by the flesh includes, among other sins: lying, hatred, divisions, greed, selfishness, and sexual immorality. The unregenerate man uses the natural gifts given by God to communicate blasphemy and profanity. In a Christian, however, the Spirit changes the condition and disposition of the heart resulting in godly communication, which is produced by the Spirit and is motivated by love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).
• Our goal is to become like Christ. As such, Ephesians 4:15 tells us to speak the truth in love. We are not to be profane or unwholesome but rather speak in a way that builds up others (Ephesians 4:29).
• We, like Jesus, should communicate in humility. Pride is one of the greatest stumbling blocks to Christian communication, as it keeps us from confessing our sins to God and to one another. It can even cause our communication to be haughty and selfish, when it should be humble and sacrificial. Instead of communicating from an attitude of pride, we are called to imitate the humility of Christ (Philippians 2:5). We are 100% dependent on the power of Christ and His Spirit to do so (Philippians 2:13).
• It is a helpful life motto to be “quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger” (James 1:19).

IMPLICATIONS FOR TODAY

Our heart condition presents the first challenge to Christian communication: We are all born with a sin nature (Romans 3:23; 5:12; 6:23), so our hearts are inherently corrupt (Jeremiah 17:9). Bad hearts produce bad communication. Thankfully, the Spirit of God removes our corrupt, unbelieving hearts and replaces them with hearts that believe in Christ and desire to obey God (Ezekiel 11:19-20). Christ then becomes our mediator, the peacemaker between God and us (1 Timothy 2:5; Romans 5:1)). Because of Christ, we can communicate with God through prayer, trusting that He hears us and responds to us (Hebrews 4:14-16; John 15:7-8). Our new life in Christ affects not only our relationship with God, but the way we interact with others (Colossians 3; Ephesians 4:31-32). Our old, fleshly ways of communicating through gossip, grumbling, or complaining, for example, are to be replaced with building each other up and giving thanks (1 Timothy 5:13; Ephesians 4:29; Philippians 2:14; 1 Thessalonians 5:18). When we give into our old nature and commit sin (Romans 7:19; James 3:2; 1 John 1:8), we can confess our sins and ask God to fill us with the Spirit, renew our hearts, and enable us to persevere as He has promised He will do (1 John 1:9; Psalm 51:10; Philippians 1:6). Ultimately, as imitators of Christ Jesus, we are to extend compassion and love, communicating in such a way that is motivated by a deep concern for the spiritual well-being of others; we cannot communicate in a Christ-like manner in our own power (John 15:5).

UNDERSTAND

• The Bible provides guidelines for believers’ communication.
• Believers’ testimony is impacted by how they communicate.
• The Holy Spirit enables believers to communicate in a way that honors God.

REFLECT

• How has your communication content and/or style changed as you’ve matured in Christ?
• What are your biggest communication challenges as a Christian?
• What is your approach to sharing the gospel?

ENGAGE

• How can we engage nonbelievers in conversations about Christ?
• In social or work situations, what are some ways to avoid conversations that tear down rather than build up?
• What are some challenges we encounter in communicating with others and how can that impact our witness?