How can I heal from the hurt of a broken relationship?
The hurt of a broken relationship can derail and devastate us. It can cause feelings of pain, loss, confusion, guilt, heartbreak, anger, rejection, and sadness. Although we typically think of a relationship in romantic terms, we can also have broken relationships with friends and family members. Some people try to numb the pain through antidepressants, drugs, or alcohol. Others push to move forward jumping into a new relationship, getting a makeover, or trying new things. Some find help in counseling and positive thinking and others remain stuck in their depression and anger. While time can help a person to move forward, only God can bring true healing to a broken heart.
God understands the hurt of a broken relationship better than anyone. When Adam and Eve sinned in the garden of Eden they were separated from God. The relationship between God and His creation was broken (Isaiah 59:2). Jesus also suffered from broken relationships. He was rejected by the community He grew up in when He went to preach to them. He was betrayed by Judas, one of His closest followers. He was abandoned by the disciples and denied by Peter in the final hours of His life. He was crucified on the cross by the people He came to save (Mark 6:1–4; Matthew 26:14–16, 75).
Yet, the very fact that Jesus suffered while on this earth is the reason we have hope. Jesus suffered, but He overcame the brokenness of the world. In doing so, He restored and redeemed the broken relationship between God and His creation. Therefore, God can restore and redeem the brokenness in our lives (Romans 8:1–39).
If you are suffering from a broken heart, turn to God. When you put your faith in Jesus, He will begin to bring healing into your life. The Bible tells us that Jesus can empathize with us (Hebrews 4:15). He knows that we need to be loved. He loves us unconditionally regardless of who we are or what we have done. When we accept Him as our Savior, our new identity is as a child of God (John 1:12). God will comfort us and promises to never leave us (2 Corinthians 1:3–4; Hebrews 13:5; Isaiah 43:2). He transforms our thoughts and instills us with joy that is not shaken by our circumstances. He equips us so that we can stand strong in the face of hardship (2 Peter 1:3–8; James 1–5; Ephesians 6:10–18;).
The most important step in the healing process is forgiveness. In order to receive forgiveness for our sins, we have to confess them to God and accept that it is only through the presence of Jesus in our lives that we can be saved (John 3:16–18; 1 John 1:9; Ephesians 2:8–9). Likewise, healing can only come into a broken relationship when forgiveness is present. We must forgive and ask for forgiveness so that both us and the other person can experience healing (Ephesians 4:32).
We will experience heartbreak in this lifetime because we live in a broken world. However, one day Jesus will come back and sin will be defeated once and for all. God promises, "He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away" (Revelation 21:4).
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