How can I have my prayers answered by God?

TL;DR:

God always hears His children, but unconfessed sin, wrong motives, or a lack of faith can hinder our prayers. When we abide in Christ and seek His will above all else, we can trust His answer—whether it’s “yes,” “no,” or “wait.”

what does the bible say?

First, we can be sure that as children of God we have access to Him through prayer through Jesus Christ (Hebrews 4:14-16; 10:19-23). With that being said, there may be some reasons as to why we feel God supposedly hasn’t answered our prayers yet, such as unrepented sin (Isaiah 1:13-17; 59:1-2; Psalm 66:18), unforgiveness (Mark 11:25), doubt (James 1:5-8), misplaced requests that are not honoring to God (James 4:3), or if we are a husband, ill-treatment toward our wife (1 Peter 3:7). We can rest assured that God will always answer our prayers of repentance with forgiveness (1 John 1:9), and He graciously gives us wisdom when we ask for it in faith (James 1:5-8). Believers must also abide in Christ; when we do so, our will aligns with God’s, and He grants prayer requests that coincide with His will (John 15:7). Additionally, we can know that even if we are overcome with emotion or grief and can’t find the words to pray to our Father, the Holy Spirit intercedes on our behalf (Romans 8:26-30). When we obey God’s Word (1 John 3:22), coupled with praying in accordance to His will, our desires will line up with God’s desires (1 John 5:14-15)

from the old testament

We may not be having our prayers answered because of unrepented sin in our lives (Isaiah 1:13-17; 59:1-2). The solution is to confess our sins to the Lord and repent of them.
As the psalmist says, "If I had cherished iniquity in my heart, the Lord would not have listened" (Psalm 66:18). Choosing sin over complete surrender to Christ certainly hinders our prayers.

from the new testament

Unforgiveness may be getting in the way of our prayers being answered. Jesus says, "whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that you Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses" (Mark 11:25).
God promises to answer the prayers of those who are abiding in Him (John 15:7). Abiding looks like having a personal relationship with Jesus, but the intimacy of the relationship can be deepened as we obey God’s Word and foster prayer time with our Heavenly Father.
Sometimes we aren't sure what to pray, and are overwhelmed by what seems like a lack of attention or response to our prayers. However, we can trust that the Holy Spirit intercedes on our behalf when we can’t find the words to say. God will work things together for our good and for His purposes (Romans 8:26-30).
Hebrews 4:14-16 and 10:19-23 make it clear that children of God can approach Him confidently in prayer. We have access to God at all times because of Jesus. Nothing can separate us from this privilege and our eternal relationship with God—not even our sin.
We may not have our prayer answered yet because we are not asking with the intent of actually following God's ways. James 1:5-8 says, "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways." Our faith in prayer shows our trust in God.
James 4:3 says, "You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions." We should not ask God for things that are blatantly sinful.
First Peter 3:7 says, "Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered." Not honoring God in our marital relationship can hinder our prayer requests.
While there are ways our prayers can be hindered, the good news is that God promises to always answer "yes" to some prayers. He promises to forgive us when we pray in repentance: "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us of all unrighteousness" (1 John 1:9).
God promises that He will hear and answer the prayers of those who obey Him: "and whatever we ask we receive from him, because we keep his commandments, and do what pleases him" (1 John 3:22).
The more our will lines up with God's, the more often our prayer requests are granted First John 5:14-15 says, "And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. And if we know that he hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of him."

implications for today

Many people think of answered prayer as God granting a request. If circumstances don't turn out the way we prayed for them to, we tend to think of our prayers as being "unanswered." But sometimes God answers a prayer request with "no" or "wait." Not getting what we've asked for does not mean that God hasn't heard our prayer or that He doesn't care. Our omniscient God is far above us and knows what is for our best much better than we do (Isaiah 55:8-9). God also works with more patience than we are capable of, and He often speaks quietly. When we know and trust that God is good and we rest in His love, we can more easily receive His responses of "no" or "wait." This does not always mean that we stop asking (Luke 18:1), though it sometimes does (2 Corinthians 12:8-10). In our supplications we must submit to God, trusting that our ultimate desire is for Him to do what He knows is best (Luke 22:42). Those who have become children of God (John 1:12) can approach Him in prayer and trust that He hears us. However, if we feel like God isn't hearing our prayers, we can ask the Holy Spirit to help us take inventory of our heart with an attitude of repentance. We can also ask for wisdom (James 1:5), as we follow God’s direction and wait in faith—trusting that He is working out what is best according to His good and perfect will.

understand

God hears the prayers of all believers, but sometimes His answer to them is “no” or “wait.”
Unconfessed sin in our lives can hinder our prayer requests.
God will grant prayers that align with His will in His timing.

reflect

Have you ever prayed persistently for something that has not yet been granted? How did you deal with that?
When has prayer helped you uncover sin in your life?
How do you ensure that your prayer requests align with God’s will?

engage

What can a person learn about their relationship with God when they examine why a prayer might be met with “no” or “wait”?
How can persistence in prayer, including wrestling with unanswered prayer, lead to greater trust in God?
How can we encourage others to pursue a life of repentance, obedience, and trust that opens the way for fruitful prayer lives?