Can I grow in favor with God?

from the old testament

• God's love and saving grace are unconditional. For instance, God chose Israel, but His choice was not based on anything they were or did (Deuteronomy 7:7-8). However, when they obeyed Him, they had His favor  (Deuteronomy 28:1-2).
• God's love is unconditional; He even wants to see the wicked turn from their ways rather than die (Ezekiel 33:11). But His favor is relational and conditional, much like fellowship with Him is. Those living in sin cannot grow close to God, nor do they garner His favor. Isaiah wrote, "These are the ones I look on with favor: those who are humble and contrite in spirit, and who tremble at my word" (Isaiah 66:2 NIV).
• David is an example of receiving God's favor. God disciplined David when David sinned (2 Samuel 12:9-10), but David's heart was always bent toward God (Psalm 51), so God favored him. David wrote in Psalm 5, "For you bless the righteous, O Lord; you cover him with favor as with a shield" (v. 12), showing the conditional nature of God's favor.
• Personifying wisdom, Proverbs says, "For whoever finds me [wisdom] finds life and obtains favor from the Lord" (Proverbs 8:35).

from the new testament

• In one sense, God's favor is related to our sanctification. As believers increase in holiness to become more Christ-like, they grow in God's favor, which is distinct from His love and grace. This is seen in what Luke writes of Jesus, in His human development: "And Jesus increased in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and man" (Luke 2:52).
• Though God's favor is connected in some ways to His grace, it is not the same as grace. God's saving grace is unmerited (Ephesians 2:8-9). However, His delight in—i.e., His favor—are on those who do His will (Colossians 1:9-10; Hebrews 13:15-16).

implications for today

Teacher's pet. Golden child. Name-calling aside, being the favored one feels pretty good. Most people spend their lives chasing the favor of someone—a boss, a spouse, a friend, a crowd, or even strangers on the internet. We adjust our words, opinions, and behavior to gain approval, avoid criticism, or fit in. Yet the favor of people is fleeting. One day they celebrate you; the next day they forget you. Building your life on the approval of others will leave you constantly anxious, insecure, and exhausted.

The gospel offers something far better. God's saving grace and love are not earned through performance or achievement. They are freely given through faith in Christ (Ephesians 2:8–9). You do not have to strive to make God love you more, nor do your failures make Him love you less. You just have to turn to Him. Just as a child cannot earn a place in the family but can either delight or grieve his father, believers can live in ways that please the Lord and enjoy deeper fellowship with Him.

Too often we spend more time trying to please people rather than God. But when your greatest desire is to please God, the opinions of others lose their controlling power. You focus on the One who isn't impressed by your showing off; He loves you fully and completely.

So ask yourself: Whose approval matters most to you? Are you spending more energy trying to impress people than delighting the Lord? The believer's goal is not to earn God's love but to live in a way that pleases the God who already loves them. A life devoted to seeking God's favor will not always win the applause of the world, but it will always draw you into deeper fellowship with Him and produce the kind of character that reflects Christ to those around you.